When you start to set boundaries in your life, it’s amazing how many people that you will disappoint.

When you start to set boundaries in your life, it’s amazing how many people that you will disappoint.

And it’s amazing how many people you will feel that you have let down.

Many have been conditioned to get their needs met, through continuously giving their energy away to others, to the point where a state of self-depletion is normalized.

When this happens, one becomes gridlocked in their lives, where they weave a web of relationships around them that are codependent. 

This creates a reality for that person that traps them in the need for false validation and security, rather than a life created from the genuine expression of their soul.

And so, when one goes through a true healing, they must go through a process of breaking out of the codependent web that has formed around them.

In this process, they reclaim their energy through learning to set the necessary boundaries that provide the proper containment for their soul to actually emerge and express.

But through this process, they are going to disappoint a lot of people, and seemingly let a lot of people down. And it’s not uncommon to shed and release layers of relationships as this occurs.

So, facing this disappointment from others, is a necessary part of the healing process.

This is because the nervous system itself is actually breaking its addiction to false validation and approval.

The nervous system must learn to be comfortable in the face of others’ disappointments.

This is because the nervous system has been conditioned to feel a sense of safety through continuously giving one’s energy away, because it secures a false sense of value to those around them.

In this, the nervous system becomes addicted to appeasing others at the expense of caring for oneself, because it provides a false sense of “stasis” to the nervous system.

So ironically enough, learning to set healthy boundaries is actually intrinsically linked to breaking addiction in many cases.

But through this initiation process of setting boundaries and getting comfortable with others’ disappointments, one breaks free from the unconscious drive to seek security through self-depletion. 

And in this, a reconnection is formed with the intelligence of one’s soul, one’s intuition, and they allow their lives to be governed from their own internal guidance system, rooted in their connection to Source (God), rather than being ruled by the approval of others. 

So when someone gets disappointed in you when you set a healthy boundary, you can thank them for liberating you from the need of their approval. 

Because their disappointment is actually helping to reacquaint you with the genuine expression of your own soul. 

And their disappointment in you is actually helping to heal your nervous system.

This is because it’s re-training your nervous system to feel safe with being self-validated, rather than being validated by others. 

And so at the core of this, is an internal re-orientation from being invested in the need for false approval, to a reinvestment into the intelligence of one’s soul, and one’s connection with God (Source).